It's closing in on one year since I started this whole journey, January 10th is when I started half ass'd and January 17th is when I jumped in with two feet and counted everything that went into my mouth. According to my doctor scale I have lost 50 pounds (my scale says 49). My goal at the beginning of all this was to lose 60 pounds, but in all honesty, I really didn't think I'd even lose 10 pounds. I thought it would be the same as it always has been, I'd lose some and then gain it all back within a short time.
I am in a smaller size now than I was in High School (that's right, WHAT!). I weigh less now than I did when I got pregnant with either of my children. I'm at 153 currently and when I got pregnant with Westley (almost 8 years ago) I weighed about 165 and when I got pregnant with Akira (almost 6 years ago) I weighed somewhere around 175-180. My highest non-pregnant weight was 202-205, I was to devastated to really see it clearly, and always just went with 202, but I am certain it was higher than that.
In this (almost) year, I have only had McDonalds/Wendy's/Burger King type fast food 1 time and that was when we went to White Castle upon my return from Australia (by the way...gross, don't do that to yourselves EVER). I don't count Subway as fast food, it was actually a staple for me because I know exactly how many calories I could have and I NEVER get cheese. I have indulged in TacoBell a few times in this year. The tacos are 170 calories and it was totally worth the splurge to me (the closest one is 40 minutes away).
I read through my blogs again over this year and cried. The person who wrote those first few blogs in 2010 and the ones even in 2011 is NOT the same person I am today. Sure, I'd like to lose another 10 pounds to reach my original 60 pound loss goal. However, in all honesty, in the last two months I have just really been embracing this new Thinner, Healthier me.
I feel beautiful and sexy, two things I absolutely did not feel before. I feel confident! I don't hate my picture being taken and best of all, I don't cringe when I see surprise pictures that I didn't know were being taken. I smile more. My husband can touch me without me pulling away in disgust or feeling uncomfortable....and my husband can actually wrap his arms around me completely for a hug! THAT is a wonderful thing.
I had boudoir pictures taken. Something I NEVER thought I'd do. As much as I'd love to post one of the more discrete ones on here, I don't want them all over the internet. haha. But having those pictures done was so freeing and unspeakably amazing. My body still has its bulges and stretchmarks, but I felt so accomplished having it done - I kept thinking, LOOK HOW FAR I HAVE COME!!
I could not have gotten to this place without SUPPORT. So, if you are struggling as I did ---> FIND SUPPORT. If you don't have support in friends and family, find it with online groups or local weight loss groups. I needed accountability and support and I assure you, if I did not have someone to keep me honest, I would not have lost a single pound. Even when I tried to skew my results, I felt guilty and ended up coming clean. The best part about loving support, is they didn't make me feel like shit, they just helped me brush off my mistake and push to do better next time. The better and better I got, the more I succeeded!
I have quit smoking again. So I still have succeeded with quitting by the end of 2011. Just had to happen twice. :)
And Last....just a shout out to my Mom in Australia. She started using myfitnesspal.com, now her doctor recommends it to her patients. My mom has lost over 50 pounds as well and looks F***ing amazing. My friends Stacy and Tom, along with my husband as well, were my partners in crime on this journey...they all have lost substantial numbers. It's all about dedication, and support. Never ever ever ever Give up.
Thank you for reading. Thank you for your loving support.
This is not the end, this is just the beginning............